Its a happy jumpy song!
What envy said is true, the first 8-9 seconds and about it being a bit thin.
This is an amazing piece of work and I cant put anything lower than a 9 but I do think you can improve on this quite a bit, (youve clearly got the talent).
I love how the song picks up after those first 9 seconds, nothing wrong with it at all!
Its those first 9 seconds that, I think, ruin it for the rest of the song, it doesnt match as well as it could and as you had said in a reply to Telliath you "where" making a rap song but it clearly isn't any more and the change has affected the overall quality of this great song.
More... Oooomph is needed! O.o
Im not saying fill it with bass and whatever else you use to give it a literally oomph feel xD
I would like to see something else in there, something that fits but isnt over powering, but then not too much in the background, it just seems to me like its missing something, hard to explain, but it feels like it needs that something to give it a bit more variety and to fill this gap that seems to hover between the main melody and the background. (dont know technical words)
Love what you did at 1:12, that quietness and soft feel it had was just a perfect combination to the song, its powerful yet has a soft core ;)
At 2:00 it changes to empty out to finish the song, I liked it but also didnt, similar to the bit at 1:04-1:11... to me it didnt completely fit with the rest of the song, I thought it was more of a standard finish that is found in a lot of songs, while the rest of the song seemed new and different.
I cant really say much more than that, overall this is one amazing song!
I cant give any more feedback even if I tried!
Keep up the great work and youll soon be in the number 1 top spot ;)
As ive said before you do have the talent, youve proved it here and on other songs, so just keep at it!
Hope it doesnt seem too critical, its meant to be helpful :)
Xmillsa